


Marry Me

by islandgirl



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, M/M, Unrequited Love, Weddings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:54:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,313
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25937011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/islandgirl/pseuds/islandgirl
Summary: Just up the hill, Buck can see Christopher climbing out of the car in his suit and tie. There’s a wide, cheery smile on his face as he waits anxiously for Buck. The moment he’s within reach, Chris is moving towards him, crashing into his legs with a laugh.“It’s wedding day, Buck!”
Relationships: Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)/Original Female Character(s), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 46





	Marry Me

“What a wonderful day for a wedding!”

The cabin door crashes open, a slightly rumpled, definitely not dressed in his suit, Chim leading the charge with a garment bag slung haphazardly over his shoulder. Bobby follows at a slightly more sedate pace, exasperated grin on his face with his garment bag draped over his arm.

Buck startles, spinning away from the mirror at the sudden noise. He’s been expecting them for the last twenty minutes so their grand entrance isn’t much of a surprise. He, however, is not expecting Maddie and Athena to trail in along behind them, both already dressed for the wedding and looking stunning. They all seem to pause inside the door, eyes taking in Buck in his current state of dress. Chim breaks the awkward silence with a low whistle.

“You were right, Mads,” Chim smirks, tossing his garment bag over the nearest flat surface. “Kid does clean up nice.”

Buck runs a hand over his crisp white shirt sub-consciously making Athena smile all the wider. He’s only half dressed in his suit, anxious fingers still tugging helplessly at the mess he made of his tie. It’s enough to have them all smiling at him with a soft sort of affection that makes his heart stutter.

“What’re you doing here?” Buck turns his attention to Maddie as he glances down at the time on his watch. He has a timetable for everything today, so everything runs like clockwork, and his sister showing up _here_ is not what’s supposed to be happening right now. “You’re supposed to be-”

“Relax Buckaroo,” Athena croons, stepping up to him and laying her hand on his cheeks gently. “We just came to check in on you quick. And make sure those suits got here in one piece.”

Athena’s gaze goes from motherly to cutting in an instant as she snaps her eyes over to where Chim’s bag is crinkled on the table. Chim wisely takes the hint and retrieves the bag, following Bobby’s example of hanging it off one of the doors.

She turns back to Buck, smile warm as she regards him again. She gives him a quick peck on the cheek, thumb quickly wiping away any smudge of lipstick before she steps away.“We should leave you boys to it. Come on, Maddie, I won’t be the one to mess up Buck’s timetable.”

Maddie mimes throwing kisses in both Buck’s and Chim’s directions as Athena tugs her out the door. Once they’re gone, an easy silence settles over the small cabin as Chim hunkers down at the table with his phone and his cup of coffee. Buck turns back to the mirror and stares helplessly at the mess he’s made of his tie, starting to tug at it once again.

"Need help with that?”

Bobby doesn’t wait for an answer, just turns Buck around and nudges his fingers away from the haphazard knot, rolling his eyes in a fond exasperation. There's a steady, patient look on his face as he works the mess of fabric free from the snarl Buck had created in his anxious tugging.

"I remember doing this for you a few times," Bobby remarks quietly, eyes flicking up to Buck’s. There’s a sudden softness in his face, a mix of fatherly pride and concern, as he reworks the tie. “I just didn’t think I’d be doing it for you now, for a wedding.”

Bobby completes the knot and tightens it so it sits snug against Buck's throat. He spins Buck around so he can see his reflection in the mirror, gently straightening it with a smile. Buck feels his breath skitter out of his chest as he takes in the sight, a shiver of anxiety snaking up and down his spine. Bobby’s eyes snap to his in the mirror.

“Nervous?”

“No,” Buck stutters out too quickly. He runs a shaky hand over the tie, smoothing out the material needlessly. Bobby just quirks an eyebrow at him causing Buck to sigh. He spins away from the mirror again, tugging agitatedly at his cuffs.

“I’m not. It’s just,” Buck raises his hand to run through his already gelled hair, then aborts the attempt rather quickly, letting it fall back to his side. “I’ve already had to deal with a mishap with the caterer this morning and now the florist is running twenty minutes behind schedule and …” Buck trails off, glancing down at his watch. He blows out an unsteady breath.

“Abuela’s going to be here with Chris soon. Chim isn’t ready,I haven’t heard from Eddie …”

“Hey! I’m ready,” Chim calls, tucking his shirt into his dress pants as he makes his way back out of the bathroom. Gone are the ratty cargo shorts and flip flops from a few minutes ago, replaced by sharp gray suit pants and a perfectly pressed white dress shirt. His hair is still flipping all over the place, but it’s an improvement. “Well, almost ready.”

Bobby shakes his head. “I’ll make sure Chim is ready,” he placates, settling a hand on Buck’s shoulder. “You focus on Chris. And I’m sure Eddie is fine, text him if it’ll make you feel better.”

“Okay. Thanks Bobby,” Buck breathes. He feels some of the tension slip from his shoulders knowing that Bobby has one of his problems under control. The urge to text Eddie is strong, the want to call him and hear his voice is even stronger, but Buck resists, not wanting to break the magic of the day. He’ll see Eddie soon enough. Right now he has Chris to focus on.

Glancing at his watch again, Buck steps outside the cabin and takes a deep breath of fresh air. It truly is a beautiful day for a wedding. The late October sun shining high in the near cloudless sky is warm, but not overbearing. It’s glinting beautifully off the lake and dappled as it filters through the trees. Between the small cabins dotting the lakeside, the gorgeous old stone pillared porch, and willows bowing over the water, it truly is a sight to behold. How they managed to find such a gorgeous venue is still baffling to Buck, despite the small drive out of the city.

As he steps away from the cabin, the tranquility of the lake gives way to the rush of wedding preparation. Vehicles pulling in and out, guests arriving dressed to the nines, and everywhere he looks, staff running around like busy worker bees carrying floral arrangements or trays of food. It’s controlled chaos to his eyes.

“Buck!”

Just up the hill, Buck can see Christopher climbing out of the car in his suit and tie. There’s a wide, cheery smile on his face as he waits anxiously for Buck. The moment he’s within reach, Chris is moving towards him, crashing into his legs with a laugh.

“It’s wedding day, Buck!”

“I know, buddy. You ready?” Buck asks, bending down so he can wrap the boy up in a tight hug.

“Yeah!”

His enthusiasm is infectious. Buck can feel the stress and anxiousness of the previous few hours starting to melt away as he looks down into those big blue eyes.

“All right. Let’s go find your dad. It’s almost picture time.”

As he’s guiding Chris back down the hill, Buck catches sight of someone standing near the lake. Dark hair, black suit, can only be one person. Eddie. Buck feels his heart catch in his throat. As they slowly approach, Eddie turns around. The second he lays eyes on Chris, every bit of tension leaves his body, a blinding smile taking over his face. He wastes no time in rushing up to them in that half bent over jog Buck loves so much and scooping Chris up into his arms, holding him tight like his life depends on it.

Buck stands back, gives them a minute to reunite. He knows that it’s probably felt like days since Eddie has seen Chris, between working and dealing with last minute wedding details. They deserve a moment together, one last father-son moment alone before their lives change. After a moment of squeezing hugs and forehead kisses, Eddie finally drags his gaze away from Chris to look up at Buck, a soft, easy smile on his face.

“Hey you.” Eddie reaches out, hand settling in it’s familiar place at the juncture of his neck and shoulder, thumb brushing over his pulse point.

“Hey,” Buck’s breath hitches, he’s sure Eddie can feel the spike in his pulse at the contact.

“Thanks for-” Eddie starts, but Buck waves him off.

“You gotta go meet the photographer,” Buck encourages with a smile. “And I have to go make sure Chim is actually dressed.”

Eddie barks out a laugh that releases any remaining tension in the air. Buck feels that laugh sinking deep into his soul, pulling at his heartstrings. He smiles warmly at the Diaz boys before he waves them off. “Go. I’ll see you up there.”

Buck forces himself to pull back and walk away. By the time he makes it back to the cabin, Bobby has Chim, as promised, fully dressed. In fact, they’re both ready, ties knotted, hair styled, shoes polished. They’re both sitting, sipping water and scrolling through their phones. Three suit jackets sit, draped carefully across chair backs, boutonnières pinned to the lapels, ready and waiting to go. There’s nothing else for him to do, Buck realizes, as he stands in the middle of the cabin. No one to keep on schedule, no one to pick up or usher to the right place, nothing to hold his attention because it’s all been taken care of.

Bobby looks up from his phone, eyeing Buck. “Chris get here okay?”

“Yeah,” Buck nods, snapping out of his daze. “He’s with Eddie and the photographer now.”

“Good,” Bobby hums. Chim flicks an indecipherable glance between them.

They linger awkwardly for a moment, all caught in a bubble of silence, not knowing what to say or what to do. The stillness is broken when a knock sounds at the door. A perky blonde woman, the wedding planner’s assistant Buck realizes, sticks her head in, giving them a blinding smile.

“You all ready to go, gentleman? We’re ready for you.”

Chim pops up, snagging his suit jacket off the chair. “Let’s do this,” he calls out, striding towards the door.

Bobby follows more sedately. He picks up Buck’s suit jacket, holding it out to him. Buck eases his arms into the jacket with Bobby’s assistance.

"I'm proud of you, kid," Bobby tells him, voice soft with fatherly pride. He straightens Buck’s collar and gives his shoulder a firm squeeze. For a moment, Buck thinks he might say something else before Bobby decides better of it, giving him a smile and stepping back. "You ready?"

"Yeah," Buck breathes. He runs a hand down his front, smoothing the tie in place before he buttons his jacket. "I'm ready. Let's go."

Buck and Bobby are the last to step out of the cabin where Chim and the assistant are waiting. A few feet away, Buck can see Eddie and Christopher making their way back towards the group. Even from this distance it’s easy to see the smile on both their faces, hear Chris’s giggle as he throws his head back and laughs in glee. Buck watches them, heart fluttering as his chest fills with love and affection.Just when he thinks he couldn’t possibly love them more, they take his breath away.

As if sensing his thoughts, Eddie turns away from Chris, eyes searching and finally landing on Buck. His smile is soft and easy as they approach the small group, shoulder knocking lightly into Buck’s as he comes to stand next to him. The contact only lasts a moment before Chris squeezes between them, eyes bright as he looks up at Buck and smiles that blinding smile.

He knows he should be paying attention, the wedding planner and her assistant are rattling on with last minute instructions about walking order and music cues, all things they went over before. It’s important, Buck knows, but not as important as soaking in this very moment, memorizing the feel of Chris’s hand in his and the way he can catch a whiff of Eddie’s body wash when the breeze blows just right and the way Eddie looks when he casts a sideway glance over at Buck, part exasperation, part amusement, radiating warmth and love he can feel through every cell of his body.

If he weren’t concentrating so hard on Eddie, though, he never would’ve seen it. It’s there and gone in a flash, but it’s enough to draw Buck’s attention. A brief fluttering of white. He looks up to the top of the hill in time to see a woman in a white dress exit a car and slip into the building.

The bride.

Seeing her feels like a punch to the gut, so sharp and so swift it steals his breath. If anyone else sees her, they don't react. Buck feels like the world is suddenly crumbling beneath his feet, a piercing pain lancing through his chest with every beat of his heart. He can't do this. Eddie's smiling face is right in front of him, how is he supposed to do this? Buck stumbles back a step, breaking whatever trance had been over them. Eyes snap in his direction, faces turning down into frowns as worry clouds their eyes. He can't tell what his face is doing, but it must not be good judging by the open concern on Chim’s face and the pinched brow on Bobby's.

"Forgot my boutonnière," Buck mumbles as he staggers back a few more steps, turning unsteadily and slipping back into the cabin.

Just inside the door isn't safe enough though, Buck forces his feet to move until he's in the bathroom, door locked behind him. His breath shudders out of him, body folding up like a deflated balloon as he slides to the floor. 

This is it, he realizes. He's here, end of the line. Eddie's wedding. While he always knew where all of this had been heading the last six months, part of him had always been in denial. He'd always thought at some point it would stop, change course, history would rewrite itself. It never had though. Eddie had fallen in love with a woman that ... as much as it hurt to realize, was actually kind of perfect for Eddie and Christopher. She had come in and slid right into their lives like she was made to be there. Eddie loved her, but more so, Christopher loved her ... and she loved them. She loved them enough to put up with Buck being an awkward tagalong on several family dates because that's what Chris wanted.

Buck buries his face in his hands as his eyes burn with tears. He can't hate her, never could, because she was good for the Diaz boys and she was amazing to them. It's not her fault that Buck had a chance, but was too chicken to take it. His lips had been inches from Eddie's when he'd veered off course at the last moment, afraid to take that step. He'd told himself there would be time, that he'd have another chance. Except two weeks later Eddie came into the firehouse with a wide grin and spouting a tale of an amazing first date. And that was it.

It had been hard to hear how happy Eddie was with her and to see how perfect they were as a family unit. It got harder when Eddie showed Buck the ring and announced his plans to propose. It felt near impossible when Eddie asked him to be his best man. Being thrust into wedding planning conversations, trying to keep up a chipper smile around all of them the whole time ... it was exhausting. It was hardest around Christopher, his co best man. The kid was just too good at reading other’s emotions so Buck had to keep a tight lid on everything. It's been a lot deal with, too much.

Part of Buck wants to grab Eddie, push him up against the stone pillars of the porch and kiss him, just lay it all out on the line for Eddie to decide. He wishes he could hide in the back of the small crowd, or better yet, leave all together and not witness any of this. The biggest part of him, though, the loyal friend, the one who would do anything for those he loves, is just trying to figure out how to get up off this bathroom floor so he can stand behind Eddie at the alter and fulfill his best man duties. That's what Eddie expects of him today so that’s what Buck is going to do, no matter what.

It takes more energy than he thought, but Buck pushes up from the floor and carefully splashes some water on his face. His eyes are too expressive, always have been, and today is no different. They're bright with tears and ringed in red, but after a few blinks, he's able to tamp down the wild look so something more melancholy. It's the best he can do. 

A soft knock sounds on the door before Bobby's voice drifts through the quiet space. "Buck? You okay?"

With a soft sigh, Buck pulls the door open and looks at his Captain, watching Bobby's face go from concerned to heartbroken in the blink of an eye. Without another word, he pulls Buck into a tight embrace. "Oh, I'm sorry, kid," Bobby murmurs quietly against his temple.

Before it can get the best of him, Buck pulls back, giving Bobby a half smile, dragging a hand across his eyes once again. All these months, hell years, he'd wondered if anyone else knew, or suspected, that his love for Eddie was more than that of a best friend. Looking at Bobby now, he knows they do. It's a small comfort to know that.

"I'm okay, Bobby," Buck clears his throat, forcing a little more effort into his smile.

As they're making their way out of the cabin, Eddie steps through the door, a small knot of worry on his brow. He freezes at the sight of Buck. "Hey," he stutters out, gaze flicking between Buck and Bobby. 

Bobby gives Buck's shoulder another squeeze and slips out the door. Once they're alone, Buck can feel his heart slam against his ribs, like it's trying to break free of his chest. 

"You okay? You ran outta there kinda fast," Eddie steps closer, hand reaching out for Buck.

It takes every ounce of self-preservation Buck has to sidestep just out of reach. It feels like a dagger to the heart to see the hurt and confusion on Eddie's face at the move, but Buck doesn't relent, afraid if he gives in, lets Eddie touch him, he'll completely unravel. As it is, the urge to unload on Eddie is nearly overwhelming.

_Of course I'm not okay you idiot. I'm in love with you. I've been in love with you for years. Watching you and Christopher be happy with someone else has been absolute hell. I love you, I love our life, I should be the one you are marrying today, not her._

"Buck?" Eddie ask again, softer this time. He takes a step closer so there's barely any space between them. He stares at Buck, eyes drinking in the sight, brow furrowing the longer he looks. Whatever he's thinking stays behind his closed lips however, when a knock sounds at the door.

"We're ready for you guys."

Buck takes a deep breath, spell broken. He will be here for his best friend because that's what he promised. So he digs deep, focusing on the brightest memory he can conjure up, and smiles at Eddie.

"Let's get you married."

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this and forgot about it. Oops.
> 
> Heavily influenced by "Marry Me" by Thomas Rhett. Excellent song, give it a listen.
> 
> Find me on [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/cptmeatball)!


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